Leopard Porn

Ter wille. Gaarne, volgaarne, ben ik mijn bezoekers ter wille. De regelmatige surfers, maar ook de Google-aangelanden.
Zoeken zij van “Verhuizen met poes“, ik geef ze tips om hun huisdier te transporteren. Zoeken zij “zeewier in Gent“, ik geef ze meer zeewier op hun bord dan ze opkunnen. Zoeken zij “de blote tetten van veronique decock“, ik geef ze iets wat er op lijkt.
En dat zijn er dan nog maar de 3 laatste Google-zoektermen die bezoekers naar deze blog bracht, de voorbije 5 minuten of zo.

Maar soms, dan kan ik ze niet gelukkig maken, die Google-aars. Neem nu de heer of mevrouw met het IP 212.93.XX.XXX die hier gisteren binnensukkelde met de Google-zoektocht “Leopard Porn“. Wat zocht die man (of vrouw dus, want dankzij Flair weten we dat ook de dames wel eens bloot oogvlees lusten)? Hoe kan ik hem of haar gelukkig maken? Luipaardenporno, wat voert ge zo’n mens?

Is het dan soft-luipaardenporno dat hij zoekt? Of “hardcore” stuff?

Soft leopard pornRough leopard porn

Is het Leopard Pussy dat hij wil zien?

Pussy leopard porn

Of verbergt deze Googlezoeker een of andere fetish? Kickt hij op luipaardschoenen? Geilt hij op wurgseks met luipaardmotief?

Shoe fetish leopard pornStrangulation leopard porn

Of erger nog… is het een vuile pedofiel? Arme kindjes, ik mag er niet aan denken…

Teen leopard porn

Wil hij zich verlustigen aan seks met ouderen (“mature leopard porn”). Of is hij dat al wat voorbij en wordt hij al wat kinds, serveren we hem best wat “cute leopard porn”?

Cute leopard porn

Of is het godbetert een geek, een apple-fanboy op zoek naar waarom Mac OSX 10.5 – Leopard en porno een goed team vormen?

Mac OSX Leopard porn

Ik geef het op. Vragen, vragen… maar denkt ge dat die mens nog ooit iets terugzegt? Klik. Weg. En ik, en u, blijven zitten met de vragen. En een hoop nutteloze luipaardenporno.

The internet is for porn

Sometimes, the links you find on a surfing safari, tell a story of their own:

  1. The internet is for porn“, a classic whacky Youtube viral hit wonder. Don’t worry, it’s SFW (Safe for Work), although it might raise a few eyebrows if you put your speakers at high volume).
    Old, but still funny, and the ideal musical soundtrack to next links.
  2. A quick guide as to why Leopard is the Ultimate OS for Pr0n
    Joy-of-Tech comic, “It is a little-known fact that in every Apple Store, there is a secret adult-only section. There you can discover the ultimate guide to sensuality on the Mac, with help from the Porn Genius!
  3. Internet Porn: worse than crack? (from Wired, November 2007)
    Internet pornography is the new crack cocaine, leading to addiction, misogyny, pedophilia, boob jobs and erectile dysfunction, according to clinicians and researchers testifying before a Senate committee Thursday. … “Pornography addicts have a more difficult time recovering from their addiction than cocaine addicts, since coke users can get the drug out of their system, but pornographic images stay in the brain forever” said Mary Anne Layden. … Pornography really does, unlike other addictions, biologically cause direct release of the most perfect addictive substance. That is, it causes masturbation, which causes release of the naturally occurring opioids. It does what heroin can’t do, in effect.
  4. The Cybersex Addiction Screening Test
    The Cybersex Addiction Screening Test is designed to assist the assessment of sexually compulsive or “addictive” behavior. The test provides a profile of responses which help to identify men and women with sexually addictive disorders.
  5. Recovery nation – Addiction recovery for sex, love and porn addictions

Change the way stacks look on OS.X Leopard, and more…


latest ImacOn a macro-economic level, in the light of eternity etc. etc. it’s a minuscule step. On a personal scale it’s a huge leap: after some 18 years of computing on Windows-computers (from a floppy-driven MS-Dos, through 3.11, Windows 95, XP, and a quick glance at Vista), I’ve switched to Apple.

Last Saturday, I bought myself one shiny Imac (the 2.4 Ghz, with the humongous 24-inch screen), and I am impressed as ever I was with a new computer! It’s gorgeous, and I was up and running, all network connections configured as I would like them – as a complete newbie on the platform – in about an hour. It simply works, and it works well. Redmond will have a lot of convincing and upgrading to do before I return to Windows!

Actually, I’m a bit in love with my new Imac. I’m not yet an instant Apple-fanboy or a Steve Jobs worshipper. Can see trough their marketing ploys and scary tactics. But I’m in awe with their OS and their computers!

Only two big negative points I’ve seen so far:
Aperture (digital photograpy management program) is a dissapointment. It crashes. It crashes badly (even the Ctrl-Alt-Del equivalent on the Mac of A-Option-Esc doesn’t react and nothing else but a Power-down helps me). Might give the software a second try if the memory-upgrade I’ve ordered (1 Gb to 4 Gb, but don’t buy the upgrade from Apple as they charge way too much for memory) arrives. But there are other things that annoy me in the program: contrary to about every other Mac-software, it has a completely different UI. Just about every program has a learning-curve of zero, Aperture has a steep learning curve! Lightroom it will be for now…
Leopard. I’ve bought my Imac on Saturday, a day after the launch of Leopard, but it will be another two weeks before shops carry systems with Leopard out-of-the-box. Worse: although they were selling Leopard-boxes, you don’t get one. Instead I had to order it from the Apple shop, and have to pay 9€ for it.

But those pale in comparison to the whole experience so far. The Paul Dhoore in me advises: buy their stocks. Wait a few months, and with the profit buy yourself an Imac or Ibook (that’s how I paid for it). I am convinced Apple is gonna grow like crazy in the next years. Iphone, Ipod and Itunes are really having a suck-in effect. They sucked me in allright.